David’s Cash for Grass Project


Chapter 25: Damn finches! Zen gardening

Much work done on the project over the long weekend. First, Rose and Calvin planted a couple hundred wildflower seeds carefully in seed trays in the backyard, which turned out to be a very labor intensive way to feed premium seeds to finches.

For round two, I protected the seeds with plastic netting, and also hung a bird feeder with finch seed nearby to try to distract them. ($27 for netting, feeder, and seeds, not counting wildflower seed losses)

Seeds with finch fence

Seeds with finch fence

I also managed to get all the rock mulch spread. Phase 1 is almost complete. All that is left is to put in the last handful of small plants, and finish the border, which will require about 20 linear feet of additional border rock.

The down side to buying all very small plants to save money is that they are so small at this point that it is hard to see them among the rock. The yard looks more like a zen rock garden than a living landscape. (If you are a zen master, I understand that a rock garden is also alive in its way, but it is not, therefore it remains noisily in silence.) I hope the plants not only survive but will fill in by late spring and give the appearance that I knew what I was doing.

Can you count the plants in the area which used to be lawn in the photo below?

Zen Rock Garden Replaces Lawn

Zen Rock Garden Replaces Lawn

Wrong. The correct answer is way more than that, and two of the ones you counted were actually boulders…

No, not quite that many, I still have to buy some, and the wildflowers are hopefully going to grow in the seed trays to be put in later…

Yes, that’s about right. Nicely figured.



Chapter 21: Project Delayed due to Exploding Ear
December 30, 2008, 6:05 am
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Sometimes it seems that life just slaps you upside the head with a two-by-four.

Christmas Eve my sinuses got all stuffed up, and so did my ear. I thought I was OK and didn’t worry about it much. Late at night it starting hurting. By Christmas morning I was rocking, moaning and holding my head in my hands in pain with blood oozing out my ear. The family was fairly unanimous that this was not a good sign, and I was off to the ER. I was diagnosed with a raging infection and ruptured eardrum, and have been out of commission since. No landscaping for the last week, or likely for the next week or two. So much for the productive vacation plans. I haven’t even had the energy to play with my kids on the new Wii.

On the bright side, I have watched about 198 hours of college football, which I enjoy though I still want a playoff system. I guess this is God’s way of telling me that vacation is supposed to be for laying on the couch watching TV, not attacking a list of ambitious projects, and like it or not that is what I am going to do even if God has to get me all woozy with prescription narcotics to get me to do it. 

Ow. OK, God, I’ll go back to the couch and turn the TV on again.



Chapter 15: Getting Butterflies

Sabrina found a web site through school called ”butterfly encounters” (www.butterflyencounters.com). It explains that monarch butterflies are endangered due to habitat destruction, such as the construction of our home by callous, cigar-smoking, real estate developers whose primary goal is the extermination of all that is good and natural. I am paraphrasing.

The butterfliers encourage us to plant  milkweed – the attractive native plant which is the sole food source for monarch butterfly caterpillars. Coincidentally, they sell milkweed seeds, and they post beautiful photos of different types of milkweed in bloom. I am too inexperienced in botany to answer my wife’s philosophical question, “If it is so pretty, why is it called a ‘weed’?”

I spent $20 ordering seeds for a few varieties. My kids want monarch butterflies. How can I deny them? See, I can be flexible. I changed the plan. Interestingly, though, it is not easy to get the seeds to germinate. Another mini-project.

I am skeptical that butterflies will just show up if I plant this stuff, but Genelle (All Things Wild person) assured me that if we grow milkweed, monarch butterflies really will come. And I don’t have to plow under an entire field of corn and wear a funny cap. I wonder what the caterpillars do to the plants’ weedy beautifulness. It all sounds cool and science-y. For the kids.

Update 12/16/08: Seeds are cheap. Dozens of seeds cost the same as one small plant, are cheaper to ship, and I’m not out $9 if I kill one. If I can grow them, my budget is in much better shape. I found a great source for native California wildflower seeds to go with my milkweed seeds, Larner Seeds (www.larnerseeds.com). I ordered poppies, yellow-eyed grass, blue-eyed grass, lupine, bluebells, monkeyflower, and rosy yarrow.



Chapter 14: Don’t Mess With My Plan!
December 14, 2008, 4:57 am
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Jennifer implied that now that I have created an actual plan, I may have become a bit obsessive about it. I figured out the hints in the car on the way home by deciphering such cryptic comments as, “STOP OBSESSING OVER YOUR STUPID PLAN!”

Look, I have gone to great lengths to determine exactly the native plants I want after extensive and painstaking research over recent weeks. Yesterday the kids and Jennifer were wandering around All Things Wild at the market while I was picking up my order. They were looking at other plants on display that were not on my list and asking, “Can we get one of these?” or “How about this? This is pretty.” I just said, “Not today, that’s not in the plan.” Jennifer thinks I phrased it differently. In my defense, I also only brought $204, and the order was already like $201.98.

Jennifer asked why all the plants I like are IN the plan, and the ones she and the kids like are NOT. “Because I did the reasearch, and designed in things that fit and will grow well in the different parts of the yard. What I am getting all works together,” I replied.

“Your botanical and landscape design expertise consists of 3 hours on the internet looking at plant pictures, and based on your history of growing stuff, anything the kids pick randomly is more likely to survive in the yard then whatever you put in your “plan”,” she countered. ”Lighten up and be flexible.”

My goal now is to try to act flexible while not actually changing anything, because my plan is perfect.

Shut up.



Chapter 12: Gourmet Rocks, Next-door Neighbors Join the Party

I decided I wanted to put a nice stone border around the edges of the project to keep the rock mulch from spilling over. I hadn’t seen anything I liked for a border at Sierra, but using the power of Google I found another local rock seller, A&A Stepping Stones in Newcastle.

Rose and I drove up to look around after I got off work yesterday, because Rose loves rocks and dirt. My other kids did not want another van ride sharing seats with boulders. They had a dazzling selection of rocks, and I found a species that comes in long, narrow rectangular pieces, absolutely perfect for a border. Rose and I loaded about 150 linear feet of it onto a pallet to be carried to my minivan. The stone is called “Petrified Seashore”, which is ironic because I was petrified when it wieghed in at 530 pounds and the clerk rang it up at $228. Plus $38 for about ten or so ordinary 40-pound decorative boulders that we also chose. Rose again got to ride awkwardly in between the 900 pounds of rocks in the minivan, not counting several pounds she had secretly stuffed into her pockets as souveneirs.

This relates to the neighbors because today after work I finished laying the rock to make the border between my half of the driveway strip and my neighbor’s grassy half. As soon as I finished, my neighbor came out and said that he did want in on the plan after all, if it is not too late to do the whole driveway strip. His wife is into gardening, thinks my native plant habitat is a really great idea, and wants to help.

I am so excited to have the neighbors on board. Despite having to take out the border I just layed and add to the rock order, I think it will look much better to not have the strip split up. And I have the comfort of company in the insanity. Also, they have three kids who want to help, and free child labor is always welcome where moving rock is concerned.

Flagstone, Petrified Seashore, and boulders staged on grassless yard

Flagstone, Petrified Seashore, and boulders staged on grassless yard

(And why does this tree still have this many leaves in mid-December? Weird.)


Chapter 9: All Things Wild

We got a flyer from the Cash for Grass program for a class at the library on landscaping with native plants. I thought this might be useful given that I know absolutely nothing about landscaping or plants, so I signed up, and also took my daughters, 8 and 10. About half the class were fellow “Cash for Grass” program participants. I think I was the only one planning to do all the work myself.

The class was led by Genelle, a young woman with the appearance and demeanor of a passionate environmental type who has found her calling. Dressed for gardening, her casual appearance belied her keen intelligence, education, and experience. Genelle runs her own small business called “All Things Wild” (www.alltingswildca.com). She consults with commercial landscapers, and also sells native plants at a local farmer’s market on Saturdays. She brought a dozen or so popular native plants so we could see them first hand. Where safe, my daughter Rose also smelled, felt, and tasted them. Genelle was great, the kids loved the class, and they are very excited to help with the yard. Also my daughters now want to grow up to be people who sell native plants at the farmer’s market. We’ll be visiting her stand soon to buy plants.

I also found some fantastic California native plant web sites.

The best is www.laspilitas.com. This is a nursery, but they post information and photos on almost every native California plant, whether they sell them or not, and they have an on-line store that carries many of them and will ship.   

http://calphotos.berkeley.edu/flora/, run by the University of California at Berkeley, has more photographs from a variety of sources for almost every native plant, including data on where it grows and/or was found and photographed.

Surprisingly, the California Native Plant Society web site http://www.cnps.org/ was not much help as far as actual landscaping ideas and guidance.

I am now finally designing my new landscape, on actual paper.



Chapter 4: Firing people
October 7, 2008, 11:53 pm
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I fired the lawn people. It was not easy to do. No, not the emotional part – well, that too - but I mean really, technically, it was not easy to do. The guy I hired a year ago never comes anymore and the person that does come for him, a rather muscular older woman with a bright smile, does not speak any English.

I speak just barely enough Spanish to be able to have conveyed and confirmed that she understood that this was the last month I needed their services. Not much smiling involved at that point. I hope she understood that it was not her fault, but that there is just not going to be any lawn to mow anymore.



Chapter 3: Happy Habitat
October 1, 2008, 11:34 pm
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After some research into what is available in the drought-tolerant-plant category, my children and I decided that we want to put in a landscape consisting entirely of plants native to our area of California. The reason for this is to help preserve native species as well as meeting the drought-tolerant goal, and particularly to attract more butterflies, hummingbirds, and endangered species of native bees, so that my children can catch them and put them in a jar. Or something.

We hope to create a purely native “California micro-habitat” to help preserve the things that naturally lived in our area before the explosion of subdivisions like ours.

I am not without misgivings. For economy, I plan to execute the landscape transformation with my own labor (and the forced labor of my children). We’ll see if that works. We are also not certain what the neighbors in our little subdivision, every single one of which has a lawn,  will think of the result. Fortunately, we have no homeowner’s association, so no one can veto my plan or design! (ha, ha, ha!)