Filed under: Cash for Grass | Tags: busted, cash, confined, drill, flood, grass, hoosegow, narcotics, pots, seeds, sick, two-by-four
I was up off the couch for a few minutes to take my medicines, and I saw out the window that it was raining again, and the plastic pots where the milkweed seeds have been contentedly enjoying the required cold were flooding over. Ack! I had planted in pots with no drainage holes in them! The instructions said “moist”, not flooded! What if the seeds washed out of the pots altogether! Almost $20 could be wasted!
I am sick, I should forget it, and go back to bed.
No! I can handle this crisis. I’m still on prescription narcotics! And Jennifer is upstairs working and will never know. I grabbed my wool hat, gloves, and heavy coat, shuffled to the garage, got my drill and went out back, in the rain, to the pots to drill holes in the bottom to try to drain the excess water and save the seeds.
It only took a minute or two. I was almost done when I heard a loud angry knock on the inside of the nearest window. I looked up and sure enough, there was Jennifer standing at the window with a look that might as well have been another two-by-four to the head. Her face said quite clearly, “The first time you get off the damn couch in a week is to go out in the cold and rain and drill holes in flower pots!?!? You could be doing dishes, or taking out trash like that bag of blood-soaked cotton balls, tissues, and pill packs next to the couch that has filled to overflowing over the last week.” I was busted. Caught red-handed. Headed for the hoosegow. Confined to quarters. Under house arrest. I tried to plead poor judgment, but that was already rather apparent.
Filed under: Cash for Grass | Tags: blood, cash, Christmas, college, drugs, ear, ER, football, God, grass, landscape, narcotics, oozing, pain, playoffs, prescription, sinuses, Wii
Sometimes it seems that life just slaps you upside the head with a two-by-four.
Christmas Eve my sinuses got all stuffed up, and so did my ear. I thought I was OK and didn’t worry about it much. Late at night it starting hurting. By Christmas morning I was rocking, moaning and holding my head in my hands in pain with blood oozing out my ear. The family was fairly unanimous that this was not a good sign, and I was off to the ER. I was diagnosed with a raging infection and ruptured eardrum, and have been out of commission since. No landscaping for the last week, or likely for the next week or two. So much for the productive vacation plans. I haven’t even had the energy to play with my kids on the new Wii.
On the bright side, I have watched about 198 hours of college football, which I enjoy though I still want a playoff system. I guess this is God’s way of telling me that vacation is supposed to be for laying on the couch watching TV, not attacking a list of ambitious projects, and like it or not that is what I am going to do even if God has to get me all woozy with prescription narcotics to get me to do it.
Ow. OK, God, I’ll go back to the couch and turn the TV on again.
